A few months ago, I sat with a client, unraveling the messy beauty of growth. We agreed: it’s tough — so tough some sidestep it entirely. You’d think mastering new skills is the hurdle, but as James Clear writes in Atomic Habits, “Progress requires unlearning.” That’s the real sting — letting go of what’s outlived its use.
We’ve spent our lives building shields to feel safe, habits and beliefs humming on auto-pilot, shaping how we move through the world. Over time, though, many of these patterns turn stale, sapping energy better spent elsewhere. Like blackberry vines on my East Tennessee farm, choked by weeds, or fruit trees drained by dead limbs, they stifle new growth. I see it often at Dudash Executive Coaching: what once served us now holds us back, quietly draining the vitality we need to bloom. Living near the Smoky Mountains, I love a good hike. Imagine me packing my backpack with the usual gear — everything that’s worked for those familiar trails. Then, inspired, I decide to tackle the Grand Canyon. It’s hiking, right? How different could it be? I load up the same supplies, hit the trail, and suddenly I’m struggling. The tools don’t fit; the pack’s too heavy. I pile on more, desperate to adapt, but soon I’m exhausted, wondering, “Why’s this so hard? I’m good at hiking — what’s wrong with me?” I hear others breezed through — maybe I should retreat to the Smokies, where it’s comfortable. But the problem isn’t my capability, it’s the backpack — stuffed with gear that no longer serves this path. I need to prune it, shed the weight dragging me down. Leadership’s no different. We rely on reactive strategies under pressure — tricks that got us here. But as our career grows, overusing these strengths turns them into weaknesses. They sap our teams, energy, and impact, driven by assumptions that stifle our authenticity and influence. Those roadblocks? They’re branches to cut away. Alone, it’s tricky to spot them — a false belief, a quiet fear, a mindset whispering, “This is who I am.” We cling to the familiar, even when it pulls us under, unsure who we’ll be without it. But here’s the gift: pruning sets us free. At Dudash Executive Coaching, I’ve watched clients trade old diversions for new roots, choosing a mindset that lifts them forward. Life’s twists — they’re not detours; they’re the furnace. They shape us for what we’re born to do. So, let’s let it go — the dead shoots, the heavy pack — and claim our purpose with fresh energy. What’s holding you back? Will you clear the clutter to embrace what’s calling you?
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ArchivesAuthorKimberly (Kim) Dudash, PCC, is an entrepreneur, executive coach, and the founder of Dudash Executive Coaching, a firm dedicated to guiding leaders toward extraordinary growth. |